When Is It Best to Keep Your Mouth Shut?
When you are angry or upset with someone, it is NOT the right time to talk about it.
Chances are you are going to say something you don’t mean. Someone is going to get hurt and you will probably get more angry or more upset.
Communication is a tricky thing for most. That’s why it’s really important to continually improve your communication skills as well as know when to communicate and when not to. Not only will it help you in business but it will also help you in your personal relationships.
Anger is all about triggering
When you’re angry or upset with someone, it means you are triggered by something that has been said, done, not said or not done. On top of that, every other incident that is similar to the present one that also gets triggered.
For instance, you see your husband or boyfriend talking to a woman at a party – that makes you angry. Whether you are aware of it or not, that incident will remind you of every other time that you were cheated on, couldn’t trust a man, couldn’t trust someone, liked a guy that liked someone else and the list goes on.
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The emotions can really add up!
The Consequences of Blurting it all out when you’ve been triggered
If you choose to go off the wall at that moment or later that night (while you are still highly filled with emotions) it’s a disaster waiting to happen. You don’t have full control of your thoughts, behavior or emotion.
You don’t want to say things you don’t mean or do things you normally wouldn’t do. It will only make problems worse. It will make you AND the person you are trying to communicate with feel worse.
What should you do instead?
SO don’t create more problems for yourself. When you feel angry, upset, irritated, annoyed, sick, unwell, tired, hungry, deeply sad – any emotion that is not one of calm, contentment or happiness – shut your mouth!
I say this because there will be strong impulses to say the things that you are feeling and thinking; at these times when you have these overwhelming emotions! Don’t do it!
You will thank yourself as soon as you have had time to calm down and feel better!
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